


promise you'll wait forever

by pandabrite



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: F/M, One Shot, blupjeans, i might write an epilogue of barold proposing properly later, i'm so sorry for doin' this to you barry, it all works out in the end, lup is so sorry, we cryin in the club tonight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-10
Updated: 2017-11-10
Packaged: 2019-01-31 10:48:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12680358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandabrite/pseuds/pandabrite
Summary: it's taken barry so many years to be brave enough to finally ask lup to marry him... and now that he finally has the courage, will the time be right..? barry pops the question. lup... makes a decision.





	promise you'll wait forever

**Author's Note:**

> day 9 of taz nanowrimo! i'm caught up again haha. let's see how long this lasts. i wrote two of these today, so now i am hella tired. anyway, the prompt today is saying “no” and as usual the list is from tumblr user lucretia-the-director.

Barry was so nervous he felt like he might be sick.

And he was no stranger to being nervous… in fact, that was kind of just like his natural state of being… but this was different. This was gargantuan in stature… something so big that he could hardly keep his heart from leaping out of his chest at the thought of it.

But he was set.

He was going to do it.

_He was going to ask Lup to marry him._

They were settled in downstairs in the Starblaster’s research lab. The Light of Creation, the treasure they sought repeatedly through cycle after cycle burned brightly in front of them, held on a pedestal, illuminating the room with radiant light, with otherworldly energy that was hard to comprehend… but they had seen it so many times, over so many years, that it was just a fixture of the room at this point.

But it cast the both of them in a brilliant shimmer, and Barry had long since abandoned the parchment he’d been scrawling notes on… To stare at Lup. Lup who was cast in brilliant relief by the light… Lup who was hunkered over a thick tome, scribbling away at a piece of paper by her side, tongue pinched between her teeth, nose scrunched… She was, fuck… she was like an angel, soft and warm and unhindered by their failures but emboldened by their success. She was brave, talented, smart and… just… perfect, really. 

… _Perfect._

It was the last day of the current cycle. The two of them had retreated early for the night to do what last minute research on the Light that they could before they had to hunt it down all over again. Tomorrow would be spent preparing to flee the Hunger as it descended, but for now… for now they had time…

“Hey, Lup…” Barry didn’t stop watching her as his voice roused her from her work. She lifted her gaze and smiled, resting her chin on the top edge of the book that she held against her knees. 

“Sup~?”

Heh. He smiled and cleared his throat a little. 

“I- uh… S’been kind of a nice cycle, right?” 

“For sure,” Lup looked pensive for a moment, “it’s really been nice, actually. No monsters, no battles, no tests of wit and danger… just kind of a run of the mill plane with run of the mill people… Little bit booooring, actually... “

“It doesn’t help that we didn’t really have to search for the Light, either.” Barry jerked a thumb toward their prize, and Lup nodded.

“Yeah, little bastard landed right on top of us. That won’t happen again for a while, bet on it, but it’s fuckin’ nice it happened this time.”

“It’s too bad they all can’t be like that, huh?” Barry leaned back in his seat a little, finally glancing away from Lup and at the Light, regarding it for a long moment as Lup hummed an agreement.

“... But…” Barry continued, “... they’re all pretty alright, ‘cause I’ve… got _you,_ here, you know?”

Lup’s ears perked, and she looked surprised for a moment before a much more flattered and enamored expression followed, “Oh, that’s so _sappy_. I love it.”

Of course, he couldn’t help but laugh. She was giving him soft eyes over the edge of her book, and she was just… so fucking cute. Even when she was dunking on him, it was fine, because he knew that was just how she was… and when she did it, she meant it in the best way.

His head was swimming. She was looking right at him, and perhaps now she looked a touch concerned… probably because he maybe looked constipated or something. He had to do this. He had to do it now. He had to do it now. There would be no better time to do it, right? They were in their element. In the quiet research lab with the Light of Creation burning brightly nearby… they were pouring over work together. They’d just had a great, uneventful cycle… they’d spent so much time together… They … He, God, he wanted to be They forever.

“Lup…” He sounded croaky, and Lup’s brows shot up… “Ugh, sorry, lemme… um, lemme try that again--”

“Lup,” and it was much more even this time.

“... Y-... yeah, babe..?” She was perplexed by his nerves… The sweat dripping down the side of his face… the way his quivering hands moved toward his jean pocket.

“Lup… I--” And he moved. He pulled himself out of his chair and onto one knee, right in front of her… her entire countenance shifted, and her hands jerked up to cover her mouth.

“Lup,” fourth time was the charm, “Lup. I love you. You know that. I- … We’ve been on this wondrous journey together… and you’ve been like a beacon of light in my life, like sunshine on my skin, I-- you… you’re _so special_ , Lup. I know I tell you all the time, but I just gotta tell you again how lucky I am you’re here-- you were a gift I never thought I could ever deserve, but here we are, and you… you bein’ here with me is the most special thing I could ever ask for… but I gotta ask you, Lup… I know we’ve been together this long, and I know we’re gonna probably be doin’ this for a long time more, but-- will you, Lup, God… Lup, will you marry me?”

There he was. Barry in front of her, on one knee, cheeks stained with red, a ring in a box set in quivering hands… a beautiful ruby glistened in the twinkling reflection of the Light of Creation… and she… fuck… she-- she felt the floor fall out from beneath her, the entirety of the room fell away as she stared at Barry.

“Barold…”

Lup… she… she… God, she wanted to say yes. To shout yes. To scream it. She wanted to throw her arms around him, tackle him to the ground, cover his face with kisses. There was a warmth that blossomed in her chest that radiated through her whole body-- she _loved him so much._

… but…

“Barold, Barry, I love you. _I love you so much_ …” She put her book to the side and got to her feet, and she approached, getting onto her own knees in front of him… and she placed her hands on Barry’s and… she closed the ring box in his palms. 

“I… Barry, I want you to keep this. I want you to hold onto this, I want you to keep this until we… until we’re done. Until we finish this fucking adventure, together … Until we’re safe. Until we’re done running… forever.”

“... L… Lup..?”

“Please,” Lup grasped his hands more tightly, leaning closer, “promise me that when we’re free from this hell, when we’ve defeated the Hunger and we’re on a plane we can call home… when we can settle down together. When our adventure is done, please promise me you’ll ask me again. I… I just-- I can’t… not now, not now… It’s… It’s just…”

“I… I get it, Lup,” and Barry lowered his hands and… his gaze, just a touch.

“Listen,” Lup slid closer, and placed her hands on either side of his face, “... Barry, you said I’m a dream come true. Don’t give up on this dream, okay..? I…” She paused, “I… I want to say yes, it’s not that I don’t want to marry you, I do, God, Barry, I do. … But… … Barry, ever since I was a little kid, I’ve dreamt of having a stable home, in a place that I could call my own. I never once dreamt that I would want that with someone else, but I do. I want that with you.”

“I couldn’t stand it if we got married here, if we got married in this ship, on the run, fighting for our lives, unsure when when we’ll ever make it out, _if_ we’ll ever make it out. I couldn’t stand marrying you and then losing you for a cycle, I-- I know it sucks, I-- I understand if you’re upset with me, Barry, I totally do but…”

“No, Lup, I… I really do, I get it. I wouldn’t ever disrespect your wishes… I-- You’re right, maybe this isn’t the right time, but… What if… Lup, what if that time never comes..?” He was just pale now, and he was finally looking at her again.

She chewed on her own lip, and then sighed, “... It will. Barry, I know it will. We’re going to figure this out. We’re going to make it through this, and we’re going to make it together.”

Barry knew she meant it. Lup didn’t say things she didn’t mean… but… this hadn’t been at all how he expected this to go. As a matter of fact, it… was probably the worst outcome. He slid the box into his back pocket. He couldn’t deny he was… crushed. He… he understood where she was coming from, but, to Barry it… it seemed like maybe if they didn’t do it now, they’d never get a chance. What if they never got a chance..?

Lup was watching his expression intently… she slid closer, hands still on either side of his face, “Can I kiss you..? Is that cool..?”

“When… Lup, when has it ever not been..?”

“I know, I just…” She hesitated for a moment, before tilting her head just a touch and pressing their lips together… It was a slow, lingering kiss, which Barry embraced. His hands came to rest on her waist, thumbs drawing affectionate circles…

Lup pulled away after a moment, and there were… fuck, there were tears in her eyes, “I want you to please promise me..?”

He was stunned-- Lup wasn’t usually… she didn’t… she didn’t _cry._

“Lup, I’d wait forever for you. I want you to know that… I… I promise. I’ll wait until we’re safe, until… until we’re free.”

Lup nodded, scrubbing her eyes with the back of her arm, “... okay. I… I’m gonna hold ya to that.” And she gave him a mock punch to the shoulder, laughing, despite her wet eyes.

“I hope so…” And Barry smiled, but… he felt a prickling sensation of… dread. A worry that ticked the back of his mind like an annoying itch…

… 

But forever was gonna come and go without her, wasn’t it..?

It was several years worth of cycles later, and Barry was pouring over a map on a table. Great, black circles were drawn in with ink from a shaky hand, from a hand exhausted from lack of sleep… from desperately searching for her.

From searching for Lup.

_She was gone._

She… had asked him to make a promise to her that they’d come out of this together, and that he’d ask her to marry him once they were safe. But he… He would have to break it, wouldn’t he?

If they never found her again… 

If she were just gone forever..?

Then he’d have broken his promise.

The ring box was still in his back pocket. He placed it there after every cycle reset… in case, in case that cycle were the one.

… but now it looked like that cycle was never coming.

They’d broken their promise.

'Back Soon' meant nothing when soon was… never.


End file.
